Hello,

Do you have a burning animal issue you'd like to get off your chest? No? Well please drop us a line anyway. It's always nice to get some post.

Your pals,
Theo and Max

Hello,

• Domesticated cats poo in a box, not necessitating walking (like dogs), but necessitating regular cleaning of said box
• Cats with no teeth can still eat stuff. My cat Ted used to eat whole mice despite the fact he had absolutely no teeth
• Cats like to stick their backsides in your face
• Cats can be taught to poo in a toilet, though it is not wise to teach them how to flush
• Cats pretend to not know what you're saying, but they know ... they know

Otherwise, excellent review.

James P Wisdom

And they always come and sit right in in the middle of the newspaper that you're trying to read. Wrapping birthday presents is another one.

I'm tempted to dock them a point actually.

Hello Theo / Max,

My favorite piece of information at the moment is the fact that the duck quack does not echo. It is somewhat of a mystery in fact. You could take a duck into the vastest canyon or the deepest cave and still, the ducks quack would not echo.

I have tried to ask science about this phenomena several times but it never really gives a straight answer, always making out like it knows but is far too busy right now with quantum theory and pieces of string to be at all concerned with affairs of the duck.

Maybe with your influence we could get some answers?

BR,
George Gardiner

Thanks for the letter George. We've looked into this, in the sense that we had a search on Yahoo, everyone's favourite search engine, and think we might have stumbled across the answer. Here's what we found:

Acoustic expert Trevor Cox tested the popular myth — often the subject of television quiz shows and Internet chat rooms — by first recording Daisy's quack in a special chamber with jagged surfaces that produces no sound reflections.

She was then moved to a reverberation chamber with cathedral-like acoustics before the data was used to create simulations of Daisy performing at the Royal Albert Hall and quacking as she flew past a cliff face.

The tests revealed that a duck's quack definitely echoes, just like any other sound, but perhaps not as noticeably.

"A duck quacks rather quietly, so the sound coming back is at a low level and might not be heard," Cox told the UK Press Association.

"Also, a quack is a fading sound. It has a gradual decay, so it's hard to tell the difference between the actual quack and the echo. That's especially true if you haven't previously heard what it sounds like with no reflections."

He said ducks were normally found in open-water areas and didn't usually congregate around echoey cliffs, which may have fueled the theory that their quacks don't produce an echo.

"You get a bit of reverberation — it's distinctly echoey," Cox said.

(Snopes)

Next Week: We investigate why hammerhead sharks have got such funny shaped heads.

Theo & Max

You didn't mention the other way Ducks are great. The way they periodically upend themselves and go hurtling down underwater all sleek and streamlined like little feathered sharks. They stay down there for ages and eventually surface miles away from where they went down.

One bad point is that sometimes they don't totally submerge, they just stick their heads down underwater proudly displaying their bums to the rest of the pond like a synchronised swimming team.

David Spofforth

Dear Animal Review persons,

In defence of the toucan's feet - the correct term for the two-up two-down toe arrangement is ... wait for it ... zygodactyl. Now surely this bird deserves a better score. You can now go to the zoo, point at a toucan and
say "behold - that bird has zygodactyl toes". Imagine how well that information would go down with the ladies?

Regards
John Francis

Well ladies? If someone came up to you and started dropping words like "zygodactyl" into conversation, would you swoon? Or would you think, like we probably would, that Zygodactyl is some sort of shampoo for getting rid of nits and run a mile in the opposite direction? we await your views with interest.

I would like to add a comment to the pigeon reviewer. I live on the tenth floor in west london and we have a balcony which some enterprising pigeons took advantage of. Using only a empty revels bag and their own poo they created a nice looking nest and promptly two eggs appeared. They were small and white and we didn’t know what to do… before we had decided there were two baby pigeons on the balcony, adding to the gargantuan levels of poo which there already were there. They were very quiet though and didn’t coo at all at night. They were yellow for a couple of days then went grey. They grew up and flew away in about two weeks, looking like adult pigeons, leaving us with the task of cleaning all that poo off the balcony.

'Inconsiderate' needs to be added to the negatives in your review, as does 'never pay their rent, and flee in the middle of the night leaving you with shocking council tax bill.'

Holly Kirkwood

You've made a very good point there. It reminds us of this claim that all pigeons that live in towns are in fact youngsters. The grown ups are so big that they probably live on Skull Island out of King Kong.

Steve,

RE: Weasel review

Just put in a batch of my new xmas socks into the ole washing machine, I was extra careful with a particular pair I liked, well, strike me down, one's gone missing! I can tell you without fear of contradiction the pair of blighters both went in (I sniffed them both to make sure they were ready). I hung out all items only to discover x1 favourite sock on the missing list, searched machine then house, GONE. Casting my mind back I did leave the laundry door open, and in New Zealand we do have quite a few of those verminous scoundrels (Weasels), The sneaky devils must of been at it again. I support your assumption that they are very sneaky and prone to such crimes, what to do? sesqui..............

Wear tights?

Hi all,

I live in Houston Texas and I really enjoy your website. I was just looking at the picture of the vampire bat you have in the bat review section and to my surprise it reminded me of the pug. Am I losing it or have I discovered something new regarding animal evolution? Could there be a bat/pug relationship that zoologist and dog fanciers have missed? The Westminster Kennel Club says this about pugs "The Pug is one of the oldest breeds of dog, originating in China some 700 years B.C." Notice they say nothing about pugs being descended from bats, so maybe they're hiding something that would damage the pug's reputation. So now I am defering to the good people at Animal Reviews to give me an answer to the bat and pug relationship/conspiracy. I have included a picture of a rabid pug that I pulled off of Google to help make my point. I would also like to state that I have no affiliation what so ever with bats, pugs, China, The Westminster Kennel Club or Google.

Thanks,
Christopher Davis

Exhibit A: Bat (left) and Pug (Right)

Well you say you have no affiliation with Google, but just look at what happens when you click onto your name. Coincidence? we think not.

Anyway, we think you might be onto something with the bat/pug link. There's certainly a strong resemblance between the two, and by that we mean more than them both being mammals. We suspect that it's mainly due to ocular similarities, as the eyes of both species appear to be a) about ready to burst, and b) staring at the camera with the cold, dark stare of death himself. Glancing southward somewhat, it's also apparant that both species have boxers' noses. Even the ears aren't far off.

As far as this being an evolutionary breakthrough goes, we salute you. Clearly the more scientifically eggheaded will point out that pugs don't have wings, but given that the rest of their bodies are almost identical, you've sold it to us.

Theo and Max

Hey there,

I found your Beastie Boys parody pretty funny.

- Anon

Cheers
Theo and Max

Hi there,

About the otter review. I totally agree that otters are indeed fantastic but I have reason to query their suitability as pets. You say they would make an excellent pet but Terry Nutkins is missing some fingers due to a pet otter taking offence at his jumper.

This is entirely true so I reluctantly suggest that maybe half a point should be docked for each missing finger tip.

regards,

Sarah

Dear Max and Theo,

Love the site, it's much more fun than work! Here are my thoughts on rabbits.

Rabbits are evil and capable of severing the head of a grown man with one bite, as proven by documentaries such as Monty Python and the Holy Grail. When Glenn Close chucked one in the cooking pot in Fatal Attraction, I firmly believe it was an act of self-defence.

Poor Elmer Fudd got seriously injured by Buggs Bunny on countless occasions. And Roger Rabbit was the prime suspect in a high-profile murder investigation.

Also, the anatomy of the rabbit is perfectly suited to the large-scale terror they are capable of inflicting upon the unsuspecting populace. Those large hind legs - perfect for giving someone both a clawing and a kicking at the same time before making a speedy getaway; large ears which serve only to remind me of Jar-Jar Binks; and eyes which fire laser beams.

Some rabbits can also breathe fire.

Cheers
Paul West,
Sheffield

And of course Donnie Darko was stalked by a rabbit.

Hello,

I have been raising rabbits for over 7 years and they make great pets. I breed and show them. Just because they bit you once does not make them evil. Some of them bite and some of them don't. They have
different personalties. If you neglect them they will bite. If they dont know you they might bite to. When I
first purchased one of my rabbits it bite like crazy and now it is the nicest rabbits. Also they do not always mean to scratch. They scratch when you hold them because they are scared that you might drop them.

I do think that rabbits do not deserve to live in petstores.

Thank you for your time.

Jessica Paff,
Maryland

Hi Jessica.

Thanks very much for your letter, although of course we must disagree with you about evil rabbits. On the subject of pet suitability, you mention quite rightly that 'some of them bite and some of them don't'. This is a perfectly fair comment, but surely by the time you've found out if your darling new pet is a biter or not, your five year old may have already paid the price. Little fingers are never easy to sew back on. Instead, you could have gone for a guinea pig, who never bite or scratch, and have the enormous bonus of talking to you in that utterly delightful chirrup. A quick poll around the Animal Reviews secret bunker reveals that none of us have ever heard a rabbit make any noise whatsoever, save for the machinations of their evil brains.

But we do agree with you that rabbits do not deserve to live in pet stores. Far better to have them either a) roaming free in the wild, where they're easier for people to avoid, or b) neatly tucked under a piece of shortcrust pastry, where they'll get a taste of their own bitey bitey medicine washed down with a fruity red Bordeaux.

All the best,
Theo and Max

Dear Theo and Max

It has started to rain, which puts pay to my Sunday afternoon plan to redistribute the ivy in my garden and mulch my peonies - damn. To pass the time I glanced at the animal reviews site and in particular the cat review. I can see these animals have some benefits - fur for stroking, friend of Blofelt, rodent slaughter etc., but to be honest I was surprised to find lap kneading listed as a positive aspect of their behaviour.

Surely you have noticed that during this process their eyes become horribly glazed, they purr furiously and pummel their paws about - there are similarities to the embarrassing bits of Big Cat Diary when mums suddenly like to make a cup of tea. Cats in this behavioural state have the feline horn. They are expressing a fancy for a quickie down an alley with your lap (usually behind the wheelie bins). Do not encourage this behaviour - it's like something out of a channel 4 documentary. Brush the cat off your knee (saving it from feeling slightly disappointed that the cat does not want to be its proper boyfriend) and have a bucket of iced water handy to cool its overexcited cat boots. Perhaps a slight rethink of the score? I think Simon King might agree.

Yours hopefully,

Emma

Hmmm. There may well be some truth in your theory. Our research so far has led us to believe that there are two distinct stages of cat/knee union. Firstly, they do the circling thing. Lord only knows what's going through their minds but we always understood it to be similar to the 'padding down' that would be observed if Tiddles was outside amongst a nice comfy flowerbed full of peonies. The second stage, which involves purring, heavy drooling and claw based knee laceration, we always believed to be a result of Tiddles being taken back to kittenhood. The sensation of stroking reminds her that she too was once a kitten, and the purring is a 'please don't stop' mesage to mother.

In essence, we now don't know what to think. We do know how to find out though - Tomcat owners, next time your cat leaps onto your lap, flip the feline over and have a quick look. Let us know and we'll publish the results here.

Theo and Max

Re: Bee Vs Wasps

Glyn Jones is almost right with the bee stinging thing. Honey bees die if they sting someone/something, bumble bees can sting many many times (until their venom stuff runs out - then they have to produce more) however, this does not apply to male bumble bees whos only purpose in life is to fertilise the queen, they then die. Either bee hurts a lot if it stings you.

Also honey bees swarm, bumblers do not (bumble bee hives contain too few bees to swarm) honey bees produce harvestable amounts of honey, bumble bees don't, they only produce a very small amount.

Generally bumble bees are much cuter looking with a greater furryness about their body. Wasps on the other hand are fairly useless (they do eat greenfly but then so do ladybirds/ladybugs which don't sting).

To sum up - bees rock (especially the bumbly ones, i had a couple of hives last year an they were quite amusing to watch) wasps on the other hand should be destroyed because wasps suck.

Jon

Aberdeen
Scotland

So there you have it. We had no idea it was all so complicated. Thanks Jon.

Re: Bee Vs Wasps

We have wasps here in Texas that might improve the score for wasps slightly. They are a species commonly called Cicada killers or Locust killers. They are ginormous wasps, 4 - 5 cm long, that very rarely sting. They live off flower nectar (pollenating flowers is a good thing) but capture cicadas twice their size with a paralyzing sting, then carry them to a burrow in the ground to feed their larvae. They swarm around our front yard in the summer, completely ignored by our kids, even though they look quite menacing.

Since cicadas are noisy and annoying and these wasps are quiet and harmless, I give them a "+".

Tarantula Hawks are also cool, if you have too many tarantulas around.

Gary Sampson

They still look pretty fearsome if you ask us.

Hello,

Couldn't agree more about Dolphins. If they so intelligent why can't they work out that they don't have to humilate themselves with jumps and acrobatics in American theme parks just to recieve a few small pieces of fish? They're always fed anyway. There are some Chav kids who hang round at the end of our street who must, on paper, be more stupid than a dolphin, but you'd never catch them out like that.

I prefer tuna. Just as big, just as fast but without the hippy-dippy pretensions. Surely the best canned animal on earth. A fish without the complication of all those Queen mother choking (when she was alive)
bones. That must be worth a 6/10.

It makes me so cross when you see tuna steaks advertised as "dolphin friendly". Why not "tuna friendly" dolphin steaks? (I got quite excited when visiting Miami when they advertised "Dolphin" in restaurants. I was looking forward to gnawing on Flipper, but it turned out to be a supremely unimaginatively named sort of fish ).

Could I encourage your readers to buy cans of dolphin-friendly tuna, take them to their nearest dolphinarium and pelt the hell out of the old bottlenoses when they come up to click?

Best of luck,

Dave Willcock

Hi Dave,

A fantastic idea, and you're spot on about the dolphin friendly tuna.

Logically, if dolphins can leap 30ft into the air for a light round of applause in SeaWorld, they can sure as biscuits jump 35ft over the top of a tuna net. The sad fact seems to be that they simply can't be bothered.

That said, if it helps liven up the filling of my lunchtime jacket potato, I'm all for it.

Theo

Chaps,

If you like animals, you should really read Ogden Nash's poems about them. He gets straight to the point.

For instance:

THE COW

The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other, milk.

THE COBRA

This creature fills its mouth with venum,
And walks upon its duodenum.
He who attempts to tease the Cobra
Is soon a sadder he, and sobra.

THE MULE

In the world of Mules
There are no rules.

There's even one about the Toucan.

Chin chin!

Giles Thomas.

Nice one Giles. If Ogden Nash is reading this, please sue Giles and not us.

Hello Animal Review HQ,

I also like to agree that rabbits are bad, and if this picture does not steer you away from buying a big tumorous rat, you must be the next fred and rose west.

Jethro

Dear Sir,

I can't help but feel that, though the rabbit may indeed deserve a bit of stick for being so bitey, it has contributed not inconsiderably in other ways.

Take for example the cheery cockney sing-along, as popularised by Chas and Dave in the 1980's. This genre would be immeasurably the poorer were it not for that great ditty, "Run Rabbit", a paen to the tribulations of one farmer's battle with pest control.

Our lexicon too would be notably poorer were it not for the rabbit; tiresome gibberers could no longer be described as "rabbiting on", enthusiastic young couples would no longer be said to be "at it like rabbits," and Welsh Rarebit would no longer provide those few seconds of explanatory conversation.

Cartoons too have traded heavily on the rabbit form.

So; irksome, overgrown rats they may be, but the rabbit's character and contribution to culture, in my view, means that it deserves an extra point. At least.

And their ears - look at their ears. Look at those long floppy silly ears and tell me they don't deserve at least a 4.

Yours etc,

Jay Elwes
London

You're right. They don't deserve at least a 4.

Theo and Max

Inspired...

Have just found your website and was so moved by it that I felt it necessary to write and congratulate you for a truly outstanding site. Imformative, practical, 100% accurate, flawless.... essential reading material for anyone tempted leave Blighty or go off-piste in the local zoo.

As the 'most bored worker in the country' I thought the only way to struggle through my day was trawling through the archives on The Onion and emaling my busy friends (who the more I email, the less friendly they appear to be) - but no more! I will endeavour to contribute reviews... had pet guinea pigs as a child and there is a lot more to them that meet the eye.

Anyway... keep up the good work. I'm off to stare blankly at a spreadsheet for an hour before it's safe to go back to the information superhighway....

Lintilla Turner

Thanks Lintilla,

A guinea pig review would be fantastic. I used to keep them too, and they're possibly the funniest creatures ever. Not only do they make a delightful squeaking noise that sounds as if they're really making an effort to talk to you, but their turds have a cohesive firmness that makes clearing up after them more of an easter egg hunt than a chore.

Looking forward to the review!

Theo

Thank you very much,

I've just laughed so much beer flew out of my nose, all over my keyboard and the big square thing the pictures go on. I'm laughing that much my wife assumed I was looking at porn, and sneeked down stairs to see what the hell I was up to. I am normally inordinately dour and dyslexic and can't normally be bothered to contact anyone about anything, so please take this as a compliment. More of it please.

I am especially fond of monkeys and donkeys wearing things that aren't really hats as hats, and you dont see very much of that sort of thing anymore outside Eastern Europe.

I have some pictures somewehere tho' of a camel in Tunisia necking a bottle of diet coke, but it was very fast and I was on my honeymoon and was very tired, I will try to find them for you and will then insist on sending them, even if you dont want them I will send them anyway as I've waited 10 years to find a use for them.

Ray Lamb.

Hi Ray

Were really glad you like the site.

Tunisian camels drinking carbonated beverages is something we don't have enough of on the site, so if you ever do find the pictures, we'd love to put them up.

Theo and Max

And he did! Hooray!

Ray explains further:

"Hello,

Found the camel drinking bottle of coke picture.

Unfortunately it was very quick going down, so I very nearly missed it, and every time you wanted the camel to do it again you had to pay the keeper a dollar. After a couple of attempts, the vile creature kept belching and refused to drink anymore. Hope you find a use for it as I never have.

The zoo itself, I can't remember exactly where it was, except it was some godforsaken place right down south, and was frankly bizarre, for a small consideration, the keepers would let the animals out for you to inspect and or prod. Not so bad with camels and such, more alarming when they are letting out lions, scorpions, bloody great snakes and alligators etc.

Am currently thinking about reviewing camels but can't think of any plus points at all for them."

best of luck with the site,

Ray

Looks like a brilliant zoo from here - enticing animals to perform tricks at London Zoo merely results in a polite dressing down from Security. Best of all, it appears that the keepers are allowed to choose whichever shirt takes their fancy on any particular morning to wear instead of a uniform.

Thanks for digging it out!

Dear Animal Reviews,

I have just read Patrick Matthews’ review of squirrels, and I feel compelled to share with you a recipe for pan fried squirrel which was much loved by Elvis Presley. I saw this on the telly a few years ago…

Bon appetit!

Mark Glenning,

Liverpool

Always remember to baste. If anyone else has any good recipes, send them in!

Dear Max and Theo,

My name is Ricky Swarbrick. I am 11 years old and I live in Oval (in London).

I really like Animal Reviews and I am going to write a review but I haven't decided what animal yet. I really
like the review on Bees Vs Wasps and I have sent you a Bee and Wasp puzzle that I drew.

Ricky.

Hi Ricky,

Thankyou - this is fantastic. Not only have you captured the kind and happy nature of the bee perfectly, but your wasp is almost as horrible as the real thing.

If anyone else fancies doing us a crossword or something, we could put them all together and have a quiz page. You could have one where you have to shoot dolphins with bazookas. That would be fantastic.

Hi,

Swans - totally agree with you on this. The words 'spoilt b******s' spring to mind. Still, this makes it even funnier when they make an idiot of themselves.

I used to be a relief lock keeper on the Trent (a river running from somewhere in the middle of England to the North Sea) and was going to work one day along a track by the river & caught sight of this swan coming in to land parallel with me.

You know how they land, feet out like some posh hang glider on roller skates? Well the water was rather choppy & this one misjudged it & the front of it's feet caught on the top of a small wave. Obviously drag, forward motion & gravity came into play & instead of doing the usual 'look at me, aren't I graceful & clever, doing that origami thing with my wings?' landing, it went down nose first like the U boat in 'Das Boot' did whenever there looked to be trouble.

Needless to say, I laughed. So hard in fact, that I fell off my motor bike. Breaking my arm. And ruining a 50 quid pair of Levi's.

Still, that swan remembered me & I swear that every time it saw me it was scowling. But then again, they always look like that.

Keep up the sterling work, looking forward to the day when all animals have their DNA mapped & on the net with your review alongside.

Cheers,
Dave.

Hartlepool (near to Seal Sands which, surprisingly, is totally devoid of seals!)

Hi Dave,

Sorry to hear about your accident. It was no doubt some kind of deliberate ambush as a protest against your lock keeping methods, or maybe something to do with duck favouritism.

In fact, we'd wager that the dastardly swan dug some kind of trap for you the night before, so that when it 'accidentally' crashed into that nice soft water, you'd be so transfixed you'd miss the vast ditch in front of you. Either that, or it strong armed a grouse into jumping out of the hedgerow to put a broom handle between your spokes as you went past, like that bit in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

I'd better stop now.

Dear Animal Reviews

RE: Llama review

Many thanks for the informative review of one of my favourite animals. I do feel, however, that the scoring was a tad harsh. These lovely fuzzy animals have many more positive traits:

• Their ability to look condescendingly at anyone regardless of rank or standing. They'd make the queen question her breeding
• An amazing ability to bite small children quicker than the blink of an eye. Superman beware.
• A kick that would make an ostrich jealous.
• The ability to eat wolves and foxes - Okay, they don't actually 'eat' them, but they are used to guard sheep because of their spectacularly vicious nature.

In fact llama's are now so popular they have recently been immortalised in the Llama song, a delight to collective llama lovers.

Many thanks once again and I look forward to more reviews, perhaps even one on the Alpaca.

Lucy

Hi Lucy,

Thanks for the Llama song link. It's always nice to see the llama celebrated through the medium of song, although to be honest we would have replaced the Les Dawson piano playing with a few pan pipes. Still, whoever made it threw a couple of ducks into the mix, which is always a bonus.

Dear Animal Reviews,

This may be completely unacceptable for your site but I thought I'd have a go anyway.

The Rotundus Stevenus Segalnus

Habitat: Upstate New York/Buddhist retreat
Notable Variations: The lesser spotted Jean Claude Van Damme, the marsh warbling Schwarzenegger.
Mating Call: While generally above sullying himself with the baseness of the mating ritual as a whole, you will often find a well paid p.a. nearby hovering attentively with his mobile phone number.

Personality: The 'Segal' is a very complex beast. While many maintain they are a species on their own, the head of the buddhist religion has confered the status of llharma onto them. I try not to make a point of arguing with god's representatives on earth especially when photographic evidence appears to support this hypothesis.

The complexity of their character comes across in well documented cases of the 'Segal' being roused to protect his territory whilst simultaeneously reciting chinese koans at you. To guard against this terrible fate, whenever you see the twin signs of male corsetry and spray on hair converging run to the hills!

Please approach with caution as if the 'Segal' has not been given ample time to prepare he may in fact resemble this.

Good Pet/Bad Pet: Whilst a young Segal is genrally regarded as untameable, with age the Segal's coarser edges can be tamed by weak hollywood scripts and the opportunity to have head billing with the rapper turned actor 'du jour'.

Celebrity owners: Rather thin on the ground although i've heard Sylvester Stallones mum has 3. One for Monday and Wednesday, another for Tuesday and Thursday and a spare for the weekend.

Supposedly Friday is her girls night out.

Overall Score: 1.7 (due to the amount of attention needed to maintain appearance as they get older)

Regards,
Nick Shah.

Hi Nick,

Good review. A quick office poll reveals that Max would give 'The Segal' 3.6/10 on account of his ever expanding waistline and staggeringly pretentious quasi-spiritual meanderings. I'd give him a meagre 0.2/10 because I find him quite annoying.

Considering Max isn't here at the moment, have a guess what he's going to end up with...

Moderated Score: 0.2/10

Theo.

Hey,

Its me again. I was wondering if you could a little to my review of the dog. I would like to clear up that the review was aimed at good dogs like labradors, boxers, great danes, cesar dogs and the like, as opposed to small rubbish dogs (like poodles), which are more like large rodents. The high score was aimed at the former breeds. The loyalty and the title 'Man's best friend' topped off the score.

Although maybe it was a little high as they do eat socks. If you could tweak my review I would be very happy.

Thanks,
Aran.

Guys,

Cool site, great concept, but I have to call you out on the ocelot review. I work with ocelots everyday.

1. Ocelots STINK. I mean STINK BAD! They concentrate their urine (out of spite I think) and if you had one as a pet, your whole house would smell that way.

2. While an ocelot has retractable claws, they don't know the difference between "play" and kill. Their claws are out all the time.

3. Ocelots make the same noises when they are mad or happy. You really never know if they are going to rub you, or eat your face.

Hope you make a note of it

Happy thoughts,
Julie

Hi Julie,

Thanks for the ocelot info. We had no idea about the smell. Strictly speaking though, being able to concentrate one's urine is a skill rather than a setback. I wonder if they're saving it up for a particular reason, or if perhaps they give up urinating annually - maybe for lent (or perhaps a different ocelot specific festival). Their bladders must be perpetually on the brink of eruption. Your other points too are very interesting, and go to show how similar big cats are to the usual domesticated felines.

Most excitingly, you mention that you work with ocelots every day. Not only does this make you one of the luckiest people on earth, but also suggests that you work in either a zoo or a taxidermists. Either way, we're jealous.